Homily-MAR
9, 2003 In thinking what sacrifices I would undertake for Lent, I came up with
what I thought was a brilliant idea; give up my cell phone. Think about that!
Cell phones have come to dominate our lives. They have untethered us from our
homes and work-places. I talk a lot more on the telephone, because I can now
phone from anywhere? And long-distance has become so cheap that companies are
practically giving it away, and cell-phones, instant messages and e-mail have
made us the biggest talkers of all time. J.D. Power, a company that does market
research calculated that we spend 30 hours per month on phones outside of our
work. In fact, the phone companies are concerned we are approaching what they
call our natural blab barrier. In other words, they dread that we have reached
the point we have nothing more to say. And we won't use our telephones any more
than we do. There go the profits. Because we have become more connected than
ever before, our lives have become busier than ever. The scene in today's Gospel
is quite a contrast: a desert in the wilderness of Judea. The Jews of the time
saw the desert not as a desolate place with creepy animals and snakes, but a
place where a person made contact with Yahweh, where God met his people. So
the spirit sent Jesus out toward the desert, where God was. I use the cell phone
a lot because I have a strong need to accomplish things. I always have several
things going on in my life at the same time. Sometimes I have a social as well
as a professional agenda. Thirty years ago I ran for a political office, county
commissioner because then the counties ran the youth services detention centers
and the patronage ridden county government was mistreating the boys. There were
no professional teachers or psychologists dealing with troubled youngsters,
so I thought had to solve that one. To my great relief, I lost the election,
but we did reform the process, so at least we got something done. Some of us
think in terms of making great changes in society. Some of us simply want to
build a family and own our own house. Others hope to start a business, or invent
something, or even write a book. Some of us are content if we simply do something
worthwhile for someone. Either way, practically all of us think about ourselves
in terms of our contributions, to what we accomplish in the world. When we become
old, will our happiness or sadness depend upon the part we played in shaping
either the world around us or the people who played a role in our lives. As
Christians we feel called to something good for someone, to give advice, comfort,
cast out a devil or two. We are goal-oriented. To be useful, that is what matters.
I feel a need to be useful; to be good at something and that CAN be a source
of mental health. Unfortunately, it can also be a source of stress or even a
paralyzing lack of self-esteem. We are all driven to do meaningful things, but
the risk is we make the RESULTS of our work the source of our self-esteem. If
we become too goal oriented, too impressed by what we accomplish, we can think
that life is one large scoreboard where someone is listing the points that measure
our worth. Before we know it, the risk is we sell our soul to the many grade
givers that are out there. When I try to conform to the world's values, I become
what the world makes me. I feel intelligent because someone gave me a high grade.
I am likeable because someone likes me. Or I am important because someone thinks
I am important. In short, we are worthwhile only because we have successes.
But the more we allow our accomplishments to be the source of our self worth,
the more we fear not living up to the expectations we put on ourselves. There
is an old saw in the investment business that you are only as good as your last
stock idea. In other words you can pick stocks brilliantly over the years, but
the success of your last stock pick defines your self worth in the business.
But for many of us, anxiety grows with success. We cannot fail without losing
our self-esteem. When you look at the lives of great artists, or even today's
movie stars, how many of them became severely depressed, or suffered anorexia.
Each masterpiece had to be greater, more brilliant, than the last. But even
we more ordinary folks put a lot of stress on ourselves trying to accomplish
things, to make people think highly of us. When we sell ourselves to all the
judges in the world, we need constant affirmation and praise. We are restless
without it. This is where time in the desert can help. The message in this gospel
is simple. To be a Christian means to live in the world without being totally
of it. If we spend some time in solitude, an inner freedom can grow in us. The
spirit sent Jesus into the desert to come to grips with his identity, to use
the time to determine how he was going to use the incredible power he had. When
he came back out of the desert, having dealt with the devil's temptations, he
said that all the good works he was about to do did not come from his own good
works but from the power of the Father. The words he spoke came not from his
own lips but from the Fathers'. This insight of Jesus was the key to all he
became. In the loneliness of the desert, Jesus realized he was free to fail.
He did not need the power or the successes that the devil offered. He could
just be himself. A life without a lonely place, without a quiet center, easily
becomes overwhelming. If what we do is our only source of self worth, we can
become very defensive and look at our fellow human beings as enemies to be kept
at a distance rather than friends with whom we share the gifts of life. If we
develop the habit of seeking solitude from time to time, we will realize that
simply BEING is a lot more important than having and that life is not a possession
to be defended but a gift to be shared. We might this Lent try to spend some
time in a lonely place-for me it is while jogging, or sitting quietly in my
study. It can be a few minutes of silence in my office, or an airplane ride
where I do not try to complete the day's tasks before landing- If we can create
a lonely place in the midst of our busy life and our many concerns, our successes
and our failures gradually begin to lose some of their power over us. We can
love the world but not become dominated by its everyday tensions. When we feel
ourselves becoming stressed because we are trying to do too much, we can turn
it into a smile. So let's put down our cell phones, and live our lives to the
fullest by letting the spirit lead us out into the desert.
