January 2004

January 30, 2004

Dear Sisters and Brothers,

The position of the Catholic Church on the Massachusetts Supreme Court decision on the definition of marriage is no secret to anyone. Many of you have received a mailing from the Massachusetts Catholic Conference (MCC) titled Marriage in Massachusetts: Crisis and Challenge. (If you did not receive this mailing, we have some extra copies in the parish office which you may pick up or which we will mail to you.) In a catechism format, the mailing answers eight questions on this hotly contested topic. My purpose here is not to argue with any of the answers provided. Rather, I want to pose a few more questions I think could be helpful as we confront these issues. My questions are three:

•How is marriage already threatened in our country, in our culture and in our own times? The statistics are telling!
More and more people -heterosexuals, that is- don’t want to get or stay married these days... Only 56 percent of all adults are married, compared with 75% 30 years ago. The proportion of traditional married-couple-with-children American households has dropped to 26% of all households, from 45% in the early 1970’s. The demographics say that Americans are voting NO on marriage... If more people are resisting marriage, or fleeing the ones they’re in, or inventing new permutations like cohabitation and serial monogamy, here’s one reason: for a significant percentage of the population, marriage just doesn’t turn out to be as gratifying as it promises. In other words, the institution itself isn’t living up to its vows. (Laura Kipnis in the New York Times 1/25/04)
Indeed, Catholic pastors around the archdiocese are reporting that the number of marriages in their parishes is dropping annually. It is the church’s work to teach the meaning of marriage and family and so these serious, compelling realities demand our attention. The problems that threaten marriage today have done so increasingly over the past 40 years. How might the Catholic church in Massachusetts bring these issues to the attention of its people and to the Commonwealth at large? How might we confront the threat they pose to heterosexual marriage and our understanding of it?

•What is the Catholic Church’s response to the possibility of civil unions for same sex couples?
This question is not among the eight proposed in the recent MCC mailing, although the topic is partially addressed in a sidebar. The sidebar considers civil unions only in the context of a bill some legislators are proposing in response to the SJC decision. Since the language in that bill uses the word marriage to include both marriage (as we have understood it to date) and civil unions, the MCC states that the Church cannot support the approach of such legislation. But left unanswered is the question of whether the status of civil union, apart from the term marriage, might be approved by the Church as a guarantee of civil rights for all citizens of the Commonwealth.
Last October, before the SJC decision, Worcester Bishop Daniel Riley testified on behalf of the Catholic bishops of Massachusetts on pending legislation that would make same-sex marriage or civil unions the law of the Commonwealth. In a prepared statement Bishop Riley said, “We should consider the question of distributive justice on its own terms. If a bill alters marriage’s definition or changes the meaning of spouse, we cannot support it. If the goal is to look at individual benefits and determine who should be eligible beyond spouses, then we will join in the discussion.” After the hearing, speaking with reporters, Riley said, “There should be a way for the state to provide benefits they have a right to like other citizens. But just to put the title marriage on it, I think that’s the wrong way to go.”
Sounds like a good middle road! Unfortunately, within 24 hours the MCC and the archdiocese’s spokesman were correcting Bishop Riley’s prepared and extemporaneous comments and distancing themselves from any openness to supporting such rights for gay and lesbian couples.

•Will the leadership of the Catholic Church invite or participate in dialogue with our gay parishioners? Many gay Catholics seek, unsuccessfully, the opportunity to meet with leaders of their own church to simply share their faith, their struggles, and the impact that the language of the church has on their lives as Catholic Christians. This article from the current National Catholic Reporter is an example:
Offended that a Vatican document considered her a “seriously depraved” person because she has lived with a lesbian partner for 19 years, Australian Monica Hingston wrote a letter to her second cousin, Cardinal George Pell of Sydney, Australia. Hingston wrote to Pell, “I am concerned that in your role, you are required to reinforce and promulgate these vicious condemnations from Rome. What I am really wanting from you, George, is a response that is personal, that comes from the heart, that is based on your knowledge of who I am.”

Pell did not respond to the letter Hingston sent in August, nor when she resent it several weeks later. The cardinal did not return the three telephone calls Hingston made in December. That’s when she decided to go public and publish the letter in The Sydney Morning Herald. The letter appeared Jan. 12. She said her reason for going public was to “highlight the difficulties same-sex couples have even being heard, let alone granted access to the same level of justice as heterosexual couples.”
In an article accompanying the letter, Hingston told the Herald that she and her partner, Peg Moran, had been active all their lives in campaigns for justice. Hingston had been for 26 years a Sister of Mercy. Moran was a Franciscan sister for 35 years. They had worked 10 years and 27 years respectively in the slums of Chile during the brutal era of dictator Gen. Augusto Pinochet. Most recently, Hingston had worked with movements for Aboriginal rights and against nuclear weapons. She had never campaigned for gay and lesbian rights.

The Vatican document, “Considerations Regarding Proposals to Give Legal Recognition to Unions Between Homosexual Persons” released in July, changed that. The time had come, she told the Herald to fight for her own interests. In her letter to Pell, Hingston noted that synonyms for “depraved” include “corrupt,” “debased,” “vicious” and “vile.” She wrote, “It is hard to imagine that you would actually be able to look me in the eye and tell me any of these adjectives could truthfully describe me.”

Although Pell and Hingston are distant relatives, they maintained some family ties. Hingston told the Herald that the cardinal visited her in the hospital about six years ago and met Moran. In a statement to the Herald, Pell said, “The church’s views are well known and will not change. I support them. … I wish Monica well and acknowledge the contribution she has made. I continue to regret the path she has chosen.”

Writing to Pell, Hingston said that since the Vatican prelates are so concerned about her relationship with Moran, “let me briefly describe for you, George, that relationship of 19 years. It is a rare and precious gift. A partnership of sensitivity and selflessness, of warmth and humor, of wonder and beauty. It is fundamental to personal growth, it has enabled me to face my own formidable challenges with courage, it daily enriches me, it empowers me to work for the well-being of others, to accept, appreciate and value the richness and diversity of individuals. In short, it is life-giving. The gifts we have received from each other and consequently are able to give to others would be values and ethics the Vatican portrays as intrinsic to basic Christian life. Still, that is not the crux of the matter. All these aspects are ignored, because the Vatican is wholly focused on what we do in bed.” - NCR 1/30/04

Closer to home, I received the following from a friend who, with her partner, is raising two adopted children:
“I would like a bishop to come to our house for a visit, maybe have dinner with us and see what our family is like. I’d like to really talk to him and see if I could understand why he thinks our family would be a threat to marriage. Maybe we could help him understand why a guarantee of civil benefits equivalent to marriage would be vitally important for our family. This has nothing to do with religion. I’d like him to know how much I want to stay in the Catholic church and how difficult his campaign against us makes it for me to do this. Maybe he wouldn’t care. Would he have any sense of our pain in all of this?”

I’m going to encourage my friend to invite one of our bishops to dinner - and I hope one of them will accept her invitation. I don’t believe that bishops are insensitive to other people’s pain. But I do believe that the great divide on these issues can put us out of reach of other’s pain to the point that we fail to see, hear, feel or understand each other. Certainly this must be the case when Cardinal Pell in Australia says of his cousin, “I continue to regret the path she has chosen.” Monica Hingston has no more “chosen” her sexual preference than has her cousin, the Archbishop of Sydney. To continue to speak of sexual preference as a “choice” serves only to widen the divide. Open and honest dialogue is crucial here if we mean to reverence all our brothers and sisters, straight and gay. Without such dialogue we make ourselves vulnerable to the sin greater than all other sins: the sin against charity.

I have many questions beyond the three above. Many issues here confuse, puzzle and confound me. I don’t believe that any of these questions are simple or admit of easy answers. I think of our gay and lesbian parishioners. Some are couples who are raising their children in our communion, and often these are children who might otherwise have remained abandoned. These families do not confuse or confound me - they bless me with their presence and their faithfulness. How does the light of their love shine among us? What darkness does it illumine for us? What is the wisdom of our experience of these brothers and sisters in Christ? As we do each weekend, let us pray for a “just, true, peaceful and compassionate resolution of the debate on the definition of marriage.”

Should you be interested in learning how other faith communities in Concord respond to this topic, please know that there will be an interfaith panel on this issue on Wednesday night, February 4 at West Concord Union Church at 7:30 p.m.

Sincerely,
Fr. Fleming

January 23, 2004

Dear Brothers and Sisters,

Amazing is the intensity with which the Catholic bishops of Massachusetts are addressing the recent state Supreme Court decision on marriage. In fact, the concentration on this one issue seems almost to have obscured what is the normal January focus of the American bishops: the anniversary of the decision in Roe v. Wade. (See my letter for 1/18.) The Catholic bishops of the Commonwealth have joined others demanding that the people be given the opportunity to vote on and decide this issue. It is not often that Catholic bishops encourage decision making on such matters by a plebiscite. I trust that you will be in touch with your state representatives and senators to voice your opinion.

I have been asked to inform you of a one hour Archdiocesan program on the marriage question being held in various parishes. Those sites closest to Concord and the dates of the programs are: January 26 at Immaculate Conception, Marlborough; February 2 at St. Margaret, Burlington; and February 3 at St. Barbara, Woburn and St. John, Chelmsford. (In each place the program is from 7:00 to 8:00 p.m.)

Another recent question also drew an unexpected response from the Archdiocese. Some pastors had inquired about the advisability of exchanging the sign of peace and offering communion from the cup at a time when colds and flu are so prevalent. The response from chancery: invite the people to use common sense. Would that the common sense of God’s people were more often consulted and their wisdom presumed.

Last week in my homily I drew out the sensual imagery in the Isaiah text in which the Lord depicts the intensity and intimacy of his love for us. Several people commented, and not prudishly so, that perhaps I had been too strong in my efforts here. I’m grateful for their critique. Looking back, I can see that my remarks could have been easily misconstrued. My purpose was to try to break through some of the images of God we have inherited and to present as compellingly as possible the depth of the love God has for us. So many Catholic Christian people are afraid of God. So many have a notion that God is somehow “out to get them,” that God is always looking to catch us doing something wrong. The scriptures in general (and the story of the suffering, dying and rising of Jesus in particular) are replete with images of God’s intense desire for us to be close to him. The Lord would and did do everything to show us the breadth of his love for us - that is what the Cross is all about. So, it was not my intent that you take my remarks or Isaiah’s imagery literally, but rather that we all take very seriously the implications of such images in God’s own word.

I always learn when people in the parish are honest with me. Several months ago, in a homily, I was critical of our parish’s response to a request for volunteer help I had made. The language I used was strong and several parishioners spoke to me about it later. In a letter in the bulletin I apologized, not for the point I had tried to make, but for the way in which I made it. Some folks came to me then and said that I need not have apologized, but even more went out of their way to thank me because they thought it might have been the first time they had heard a pastor apologize for something.

And that reminds me of the parishioner who told me, pointedly, that the Christmas decorations over my front porch (the three “gift boxes” I used in my Christmas homily) were simply awful and that I should never have put them up. Well, I disagreed and left them there. Unfortunately, I’m not as free to criticize other folks’ decorations - but that’s OK! What is most helpful is when you are honest in your critique of my preaching and ministry.

As I mentioned in my last two letters, we have been asked by the people at Junction Square (the office park across the street from the church) to be sure that parishioners NOT park there at any time, including Mass times. Parking there may impede emergency vehicles and is sufficient reason for ticketing and/or towing. Already, however, there is more parking behind the church and more to come when the rehab of the Harvey Wheeler Center is complete.

We have some wonderful opportunities lined up for Lent and I look forward to presenting them to you next week.

Before Christmas I promised that occasionally I would try to respond to “What Catholics Are Asking About...” In next week’s bulletin there will be a special insert on how the Church elects a new Pope. I offer this because such questions are in the news and, as is often the case, misinformation abounds. We pray for the Holy Father every time we celebrate the Eucharist and I trust that he would be pleased to know that we are learning about this element of church practice.

Sincerely,

Fr. Fleming

January 16, 2004

Dear Sisters and Brothers,

I recently received and email from a woman in Michigan who is studying theology. She was trying to locate a favorite poem of hers for which she had the title and author: The Queens Came Late by Norma Farber. My email correspondent went online to the search engine called Google. (A search engine is an online service designed to search and locate items you request.) in less than a second (16/100 or a second to be exact) Google returned 1,170 responses, with 6 of the first 7 being direct answers to the request entered. Among those 6 on-target responses was a link to our parish website, to my archived homilies from January 2003, to my homily for January 5, 2003 in which I quoted Norma Farber’s poem in its entirety. Happy to have found the poem, my Michigan correspondent read through the rest of my January 2003 homilies and found, in my January 26 entry, a reference to a young girl in our parish who had written a note to me about prayer. From there I went on to speak about women in ministry in a way the poem-hunter found refreshing and supportive. Perhaps “The Queens Came Late” but Google was certainly on time! It’s amazing what technology can do. As a result, we have one more “virtual parishioner” at OLHC who joins us all the way from Michigan.

You might remember about a year ago a television ad for the General Electric 4D Ultrasound system. This technologically sophisticated instrument offers us an amazingly clear “window into the womb” and an image of the child within. The television spot featured a young expectant couple watching their baby in utero. Even the GE ad claims, “It really is a miracle!" The ad appeared on such very popular shows as Friends, a sitcom revolving around 6 thirty-somethings and their love lives. (Ask the younger people in your life who Rachel, Ross, Joey, Chandler, Monica and Phoebe are - and they’ll tell you right away!)

There were some who were unhappy about the appearance of this ad on television. An editorial in the weekly The American Prospect worried that the GE promotion was a “milieu of clever illusion” that “blur(red) the distinction between a fetus and a newborn infant.” Of course the ad does not blur anything at all - in fact, it clarifies a reality that many find difficult to acknowledge. Others, of course, were happy with the GE ad. Those in the pro-life movement are pleased that such convincing images were aired during Friends and that so many young people saw the message of life portrayed with such subtle beauty and warmth.

GE’s goals are monetary and not altruistic - just as Google’s aims are broader than my parochial interests. Still, in both cases technology has served the gospel well, even if inadvertently. There are many new ways in which the message of Jesus can be proclaimed - but the old ways are still just as important: the American bishops have chosen January 22 as an annual day of prayer and penance for sins against the dignity of human life. As we pray every Sunday in our parish, “For respect and reverence for life, in all its shapes and forms...” On the reverse side of this letter you will find a series of intercessions suggested for our prayer by the American bishops’ national pro-life office.

As I mentioned in last week’s letter, we have been asked by the people at Junction Square (the office park across the street from the church) to be sure that parishioners NOT park there at any time, including Mass times. Parking there may impede emergency vehicles and is sufficient reason for ticketing and/or towing. Already, however, there is more parking behind the church and more to come when the rehab of the Harvey Wheeler Center is complete.

Christmas has come and gone... Allow me, in your name, to thank our music ministries (director, accompanists, cantors, instrumentalists and choirs) for the joy they brought to our prayer in the Advent and Christmas seasons. Our thanks, too, go to the Altar Society and for their preparing the church both for the somber tones of Advent and the bright colors of Christmas! Our readers, ministers of the eucharist and altar servers all deserve our gratitude!
Finally, to the Stable Guys who put up and took down our outdoor Nativity - on cold and blust’ry days - thank you!

Mardi Gras! Our parish Mardi Gras celebration will take place on February 8 and we hope that you will join us. In addition to the potluck supper, we will celebrate Mardi Gras -and- look ahead to Lent and what that special season will ask of us and invite us to. Our Mardi Gras should be a time of fellowship - good food - good song - and a chance to grow in faith. All are welcome: seniors, singles, families large and small! If you have not signed up - please give us a call at 978-369-2810.
Sincerely,
Fr. Fleming

Intercessory Prayers for January 22 - A Day of Prayer and Penance

We pray for those parents who struggle to make ends meet, that they may find strength when they grow weary, and that they may earn a just wage...

We pray for those children who are unwanted, unloved, neglected, or abused, that God may fill these voids with his love...

We pray for those whose hearts are heavy with sorrow after an abortion, that God will heal them, lift them up and help them to trust again in his love for them...

We pray for families and persons who care for those with special emotional or physical needs....

We pray for those who are preparing for marriage, that they may accept children as a gift of God and lovingly nurture and care for them...

We pray for those who feel weighed down by years, that society will acknowledge the contributions which the elderly have made and continue to make to our world...

We pray for those coming through the bleakness of drug or alcohol addiction, unsure of their ability to face life without these supports...

We pray for those suffering with and from AIDS, that judgment and alienation may be replaced with love...

We pray for the unemployed, that they may not lose courage and hope while searching for work...

We pray for the hungry and the overfed, may they have enough...

We pray for those deprived of their human needs and their human rights, that they may be given the dignity you confer on all your people...

All good gifts come from your hand, O God. Make us grateful for all you have given us and help us to trust in all you promise us through Christ our Lord. Amen.